If you and your spouse fight about money, you may find little comfort in knowing you are not alone. About one-third of all adult couples have serious disputes about their finances. Even those with substantial wealth may have a difficult time dealing with their family’s financial issues. This is because those problems seldom crop up after you take your vows. You may not even realize it, but you and your spouse may have brought your problems into the marriage with you.
What makes your marriage unique may also be what makes your divorce unique. However, if money struggles are bringing you and your spouse to the end of your marriage, it may help to understand some of the most common differences couples have over financial matters.
Who has control?
Fights about money often stem from more basic issues, such as trust and respect. It is not uncommon for one spouse to grow resentful if the other spouse makes more money and therefore makes all the decisions about the finances. This problem may be exacerbated if you and your spouse have not successfully resolved certain questions about your future together, such as whether one of you will stay home to raise children or what major purchases you should save for.
Often, opinions about money stem from far back in a person’s history. When two people have different philosophies about spending, saving and borrowing, it can quickly damage a relationship. One of you may enjoy the feeling of spending freely on payday, and the other may have long-term goals in mind. If you are unable to reconcile these differences, you may find yourself always at odds.
Whose money is it?
One of the most difficult things to do as a married couple is to combine your incomes and manage expenses together. It takes trust and sacrifice. If one spouse is unwilling to trust or sacrifice, you may find that spouse hiding money, making secret purchases or using other means of financial infidelity. This can include incurring secret debt that can be a shock when the other spouse discovers it.
It is not unusual for conflicts such as these to take an important role during divorce proceedings. You certainly want to make sure you have full disclosure of your joint financial affairs to ensure you obtain a fair share of assets during property division. With a skilled Maryland attorney on your side, you will have access to the resources necessary to reach your goals.